tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35633963437946925662024-03-08T16:17:47.627-05:00Restless Wanderlust
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.comBlogger86125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-40688153120624801892020-05-11T23:14:00.000-04:002020-05-11T23:39:02.239-04:00COVID Reflections<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It's surreal to think we are entering nine weeks of COVID quarantine. I am one of the lucky ones, I still have my job, health and family. That alone gives me immense privilege. But I would be lying if I said the past eight weeks have been a walk in the park. As someone who usually maintains composure and a strong face at all times, this has been anything but easy. This has been one of the hardest periods of my life. The world changed drastically from March 9th, when we got the crushing news about our pregnancy, to March 16th, when we entered full quarantine mode. </span></span></div>
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<b id="docs-internal-guid-5bc0090d-7fff-fcc6-8c49-9d53ff89aebf" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I started this quarantine with my D&C on March 13. I didn't know at the time that would be our last week of “normal” as we knew it. I was lucky in that my doctor was able to schedule the procedure in less than 24 hours. Eight full weeks later, I am spent in every way imaginable. It finally caught up to me on week number eight when I just broke down in tears over random things. Sink full of dishes, toddler making messes everywhere, the need for groceries, every little thing got to me. The items listed might feel silly and trivial to type, but I think it is important to acknowledge because they are symptoms of a larger issue. I have been ignoring myself and what I have been feeling for too long. Frankly speaking, there hasn’t been time to acknowledge my feelings because I have been taking care of everything and everyone else. </span></span></div>
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<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">As a woman and the eldest child, the sense of duty to others is very strong. This shows up in everything I do. The desire to keep the house clean, the responsibility to keep the groceries stocked, laundry, meals and dishes. My actual job: running an organization. And then of course there is Raza and keeping him educated and entertained. I do need to state that no one said that I needed to do all this. I just assumed I did because that's what women do. I also think it was my way of dealing with loss. My way of trying to maintain control when I lost all control over my own pregnancy.</span></span></div>
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<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I say all this to share that it's ok to admit when you're running on empty and need to recharge. Knowing I was hurting, I started sharing my daily joy with some friends -- things I was doing just for me and no one else. It also gave me something to look forward to everyday. I also asked for help, and that made me feel less alone. We all process tragedy in our own ways. I only recently heard the quote "check up on your strong friend - they're usually the one bleeding in silence." So if you are the strong friend reading this, it's ok to ask for help. And if you haven't checked on your strong friend, please do. I’ll always be hard on myself, but I’m trying to learn how to be more compassionate with myself as well. </span></span></div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-17354485990760554442020-03-09T12:10:00.000-04:002020-05-11T23:17:13.507-04:00My miscarriage <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">A little over a month ago, we were pleasantly surprised to find out we were expecting our second child. It is something we wanted but we were also really nervous about getting too excited. Today was our first sonogram appointment and there was no heartbeat. I can’t quite describe the feeling of waiting in the doctor’s office where there is always lots of joy, lots of little faces and lots of anxious expecting parents. After hearing the news, we both were first and foremost so grateful for our little guy, Raza. And then, we just didn’t know what to do or feel. There was grief, confusion, and pragmatism.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Decisions had to be made about how to close this chapter. The options are both invasive and painful. After being told I am going to miscarry, I had to decide whether I want a DNC or let my body end things naturally. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Getting pregnant is such a rollercoaster for expecting mothers. I went from thinking about names and dreaming about our little family to having it all disappear in the blink of an eye. As physical changes come along with not so nice symptoms, we are discouraged from saying anything because of the high likelihood of miscarriages before 12 weeks. Miscarriages are common, in fact so much so that 1/3 of women miscarry.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">However, nausea and exhaustion make it pretty apparent that something is up for anyone that is paying attention. I am a horrible liar and I also don’t see the point of hiding something like this from those closest to me. I did share the news with our loved ones because if I will be celebrating with them then I will also be leaning on them when I need a shoulder to cry on.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Women tend to be the emotional pillars for so many but it’s unfair to expect them to also carry the weight of their loss. I can’t imagine resuming my day to day without acknowledging my loss and the pain that accompanies it. So for now, I am going to take it a day at a time, be thankful for my family, and maybe one day build up the courage to try again.</span><span style="font-family: "calibri";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-68316614240824670012019-02-10T11:05:00.001-05:002019-02-10T13:32:58.618-05:00Dear Raza<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Raza,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">I
can’t believe you are going to be a one-year-old this week. What a year it was!
So much took place that it doesn’t feel like all of that could possibly have occurred
in just twelve months. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">In
reality, every three months was something new. The first three months, you and
I were trying to figure out our new normal while my only goal was to keep you
alive and well! The next three months you started daycare, your travels and
sitting up. The three months after that you began eating everything, sleeping through
the night and experienced my favorite season, fall. The last three months you
got lots of teeth, began crawling, pulling up and discovered tantrums. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">There
are many firsts that are forever etched in my heart. There are moments I will
miss because I know they will become rarer as you get older. So for now, I am
going to cherish every nose kiss, hug and cuddle I can get from you. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">It
was also year of many many adjustments, mostly of my expectations. You see
everyone says motherhood is wonderful and such a gift, which it is, but they
don’t talk about the challenges. Motherhood is also lonely and isolating, not
for a lack of people in our lives but simply because you are exhausted and can’t
ever find the time. There are moments that are not enjoyable, moments when you
question your sanity and wonder how you will ever survive. There is so much
happening so fast that moms often lose themselves along the way. Our bodies
change. Our minds change. Our hearts change. But life outside mostly stays the
same. I had to learn how to merge these two identities and figure out who the
new me was while learning how to be a mom at the same time. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">I
am proud of the fact that I was able to breastfeed you for an entire year. I
would be lying if I said it was easy because it wasn’t. It’s one of the hardest
things I have ever done but one I wanted to do for you. I am excited that my
day no longer revolves around pumping. Actually beyond excited. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">I
also had to adjust my expectations of friendships. Some people I rarely see
anymore. Some people I see when I reach out. Some people I see because they
insist on checking on me and making sure I am ok. As someone who rarely asks
for help, I am now so comfortable asking of those who I know will help no
matter what. I wouldn’t have made it otherwise.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">I
was lucky. I got to do most of what I wanted to do because of a lot of
wonderful people who love you. Your grandparents, your aunts and uncles and
two great babysitters who watched you countless times while I had to be somewhere else.
This really allowed me to feel like I had “my all” because there is no such
thing as really having it all. All moms have to decide what their all is in
order to find their balance and happiness. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">I
cannot imagine life without you. You have brought such joy in our lives and I
can’t wait to see who you become.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Love,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Mom</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment--><br /></div>
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-57845680668407881642019-01-03T22:07:00.000-05:002020-05-11T23:33:01.564-04:00My love of travel <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">This
<a href="https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2019/01/03/travel/52-places-to-go-recap.html" target="_blank">article</a> gave me all the feels today. It speaks to the courage of one woman but
really speaks about all women because we have each taken a bold leap of faith
at some point in our lives. I also happen to read it on the day the 116th
Congress swore in a record breaking 127 women in to office which is a
monumental milestone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrWilxFifYHE2KMV64gsafA5wzQ-X0T3CwvXaLgkNWw0WSZZEx3fffUUrq4crqDTk_6ecFIo0HL_webRLlyhYfnV-pTMqOqBBgfnOfaklvMqbVNoaAQw6jhDYh1_3BroEqzgB9jVC7QNnh/s1600/CIMG5407.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrWilxFifYHE2KMV64gsafA5wzQ-X0T3CwvXaLgkNWw0WSZZEx3fffUUrq4crqDTk_6ecFIo0HL_webRLlyhYfnV-pTMqOqBBgfnOfaklvMqbVNoaAQw6jhDYh1_3BroEqzgB9jVC7QNnh/s200/CIMG5407.JPG" width="200" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Me somewhere in Cappadocia</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">It is
of no surprise that travel is my first love. I say that often and with pride.
But I don't think anyone has ever asked my why. Reading this article brought up
all the reasons in one sitting over dinner and I couldn't stop beaming as I
glanced over at my husband and son. You see travel is the best life lesson I
have ever had. I have learned more about myself on trips than I have living the
day to day. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Jada
Yuan won the trip of a lifetime courtesy of the New York Times. They sent her
to all of the 52 places to visit in 2018 and she got to cover them. After
traveling for a year she had seven lessons to share. As I read her lessons, I
couldn't help but think back to my earlier travel days and the lessons I learned as a
result.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Lesson
No. 1: A year is short</span></b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">I
remember when I decided to take six months off and move to Cambodia to
volunteer. I knew the time would fly by but many around me were worried.
Wasn't I scared to leave my life behind for six months? To be without my
husband? To quit my job? Six months came and went much quicker than I could
have ever anticipated. Technology allowed me to stay in touch with my loved
ones on a daily basis. The hardest part was not being able to hug or kiss my
husband and I am so grateful that he understood why I needed to do this for
me. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhChjIRX_c1lOrY6Yy2VdtVjbMaOpMiXRaQnXefpby7LipUi8lSPhkMClCsOqELhXo_kc2kof_Bol0JaawI1O992UeuFJ-k5Ec1qOd0S_ZCxiCPdSzuGAfolkx1vfZiOkWStHL2hNMlN0A-/s1600/DSC02207.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1071" data-original-width="1600" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhChjIRX_c1lOrY6Yy2VdtVjbMaOpMiXRaQnXefpby7LipUi8lSPhkMClCsOqELhXo_kc2kof_Bol0JaawI1O992UeuFJ-k5Ec1qOd0S_ZCxiCPdSzuGAfolkx1vfZiOkWStHL2hNMlN0A-/s200/DSC02207.JPG" width="200" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My apt in Birmingham, England</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Lesson
No. 2: Know thy logistical self</span></b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">When
I was moving to England, it was the first time I would ever be living by myself
in a place of my own. I was a little too ambitious and being Pakistani I had to
be extra prepared. My mom helped me pack dishes, pots, cutlery, along with
clothes and other essentials. Two suitcases and a carryon later I was off! Well
my thrifty self did not purchase a direct ticket and had a layover in
Amsterdam. This layover was also where I needed to grab ALL my bags
and recheck them for Birmingham. Navigating this was not as easy as I
thought it would be. One of my bags rolled down the escalator and I was at the
mercy of a complete kind stranger who brought up my tumbling bag to me. He didn't
have to. I now only travel with a carryon or pieces I
can carry with my two hands. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Lesson
No. 3: Develop your superpower</span></b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Like
Jada, I used to be able to sleep anywhere, under any condition. My best friend
hated me for it. It allowed me to wake up refreshed and ready to go no matter
the conditions of the journey. This was always helpful when there were only a
limited number of hours/days in any given city. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYqaGu917S0xImHHVFHhNeuisEyJidxzNlRAZNp0wp5vUp4d-7-9gGtfNBjLhEL9Z9akMU5kAGMnbn3s6_RRaasjINDb1govLqv420XCnJ4inOIvY_clpUVqBIdwI4fe0wG_s2sjyPmOn9/s1600/DSC07219.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1071" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYqaGu917S0xImHHVFHhNeuisEyJidxzNlRAZNp0wp5vUp4d-7-9gGtfNBjLhEL9Z9akMU5kAGMnbn3s6_RRaasjINDb1govLqv420XCnJ4inOIvY_clpUVqBIdwI4fe0wG_s2sjyPmOn9/s200/DSC07219.JPG" width="133" /></span></a><b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Lesson
No. 4: Try it</span></b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">I
won't try fruit but I tried a whole lot more during my travels. Couchsurfing.
Being vulnerable with complete strangers. Bunjee jumping. Crash landing in a
hot air balloon. Riding in a scooter and crashing but still managing to see a
beautiful sunset. Taking a train alone in India. Eating all the street food. I have
not regretted a single one of these decisions. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Lesson
No. 5: Learn what safe means to you</span></b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">My
gut is something I adamantly listen to even if it is annoying at times. As a solo
female traveler, I may have erred on the side of over precautious at times but
I always went with safe rather than sorry. Everyone has different barometers
and that is ok so long as you listen because you know you best.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5MPYaWC6xX7vGfcE4FH6H404YmRfCtNVAQXalTCa7v5Z0apq-2TdFJlUecb4JP90e8NL_JvXrQnNaB3-c6ygyqdChwuMlsWueK8NfELZO_GxUvRB27voq2tqtbI_x7ZFF4UssaB9YRFti/s1600/IMG_8746.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5MPYaWC6xX7vGfcE4FH6H404YmRfCtNVAQXalTCa7v5Z0apq-2TdFJlUecb4JP90e8NL_JvXrQnNaB3-c6ygyqdChwuMlsWueK8NfELZO_GxUvRB27voq2tqtbI_x7ZFF4UssaB9YRFti/s200/IMG_8746.JPG" width="200" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Strangers who became friends</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Lesson
No. 6: Still, talk to strangers</span></b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">A
stranger let me live with her for a whole week! While I had couch
surfed plenty of times, I had never moved in with a complete stranger.
That's exactly what happened in Cambodia on my first day at work. I had an
apartment lined up but after arriving discovered that my landlord decided to
gift it to his newly married son. And so I was homeless. I shared this with my
new co-workers and one of them, Anjana, offered her bed to me while I looked
for another place. So for seven days I shared a bed with a girl I had just met
and it reaffirmed that the world is an inherently kind place. Many strangers, like Anjana, have become some of my closest friends and I would have never
met them had I not talked to a stranger. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Lesson
No. 7: Alone does not mean lonely</span></b><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTdWLZvefQY-2lVoHVnQTuZfT5m_a3fHYF4kieS0MMt71fOcOTpQfMx7VdTNgbS3GYmwbWyI1NYVZetX_qVG793qU97D_CGx1ucBa2952L0MqlG3eEdx6bBkLCVxTheWhYWrFkqM5zb0FT/s1600/DSC03511.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1072" data-original-width="1600" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTdWLZvefQY-2lVoHVnQTuZfT5m_a3fHYF4kieS0MMt71fOcOTpQfMx7VdTNgbS3GYmwbWyI1NYVZetX_qVG793qU97D_CGx1ucBa2952L0MqlG3eEdx6bBkLCVxTheWhYWrFkqM5zb0FT/s200/DSC03511.JPG" width="200" /></span></a><span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">Many
people I know are afraid to travel alone. Traveling alone for me has been one of the
greatest discoveries of life. Through it I learned about me. When else can you
be with yourself and really get to know who you are? It is an experience that
allows you to learn your comforts, your boundaries and your greatest fears. But
after doing it you also realize your strengths. And with todays technology you
are always connected to your loved ones. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e7e6e6; mso-themecolor: background2;">So
why am I telling you all of this? Well I hope it convinces you to take that
trip you always wanted to but found a million excuses not to or to go somewhere
where everyone else thinks you are crazy for doing so. I guarantee the trip
will change you for the better. The bigger issue is you'll never want to
stop. <span style="color: #e7e6e6;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-70679482376976530372018-06-05T10:42:00.000-04:002018-06-05T14:00:41.669-04:00Back at work and figuring it all out<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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I went back to work on May 7<sup>th</sup>.
The past four weeks have felt like an out of body experience. I don’t feel like
myself for many reasons. For starters, my life revolves around my kid’s
schedule. For a tiny person, there is a lot that is required. There is a
schedule for pumping, a schedule for feeding, a schedule for sleeping, and a schedule
for napping. Somewhere between all that I need to insert working, meetings,
eating, getting dressed, errands and sleeping. Needless to say, it has been messy.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I am a fairly structured person
but this has been challenging. Despite the required schedules, no two days are
the same. I have left the house in mismatched shoes, with half my makeup on,
without work documents, without pump parts and have basically had to make a u-turn
for home many times in these first few weeks. When I used to see women put
makeup on while driving, I just figured they were running late. Now I know
they are probably mothers who took care of everyone else and ran out of time
for themselves. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Speaking of, this has
consequences. I was making it all work but becoming really angry and resentful
towards my husband along the way. It’s tough to communicate this when there really isn’t a clean cut solution for the problem. And so I learned to be kinder to
myself and ask for a lot of help. Asghar and I are trying to figure out the new
balance every day.<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I have also been running on discombobulated
sleep cycles. Sometimes there are sets of three full hours, sometimes two and
sometimes four. But hardly a full six or seven. After a week of very little
sleep, I was a hot mess exhibiting symptoms like shaking, forgetfulness,
exhaustion and headaches. I literally had to sleep in one morning to feel human
again. I know this will pass but it is still painful. And more reason why
maternity leave should be at least four or five months.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Then there is the physical aspect. I might have lost all the baby weight but I certainly don't look the same. I basically need to rebuild my core muscles again. Which means this will happen sometime in 2019! In all seriousness, I still get random pangs by the incision and my waist is not what it used to be. Getting dressed in the morning is driven by comfort and what is most convenient for pumping which means most of my closet is useless right now.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I am also discovering the world
of daycare. The first day did not go as I thought it would. But I did bring all
the items on the checklist! Only to find out the list was recently changed by
DCF and no one bothered to tell the parents?! Why isn’t anything clearly
written? I want to volunteer to fix the orientation documents just so another
mom doesn’t feel like a failure because of unclear directions. And then there
is this etiquette dance. You want to be nice since they are taking care of your
child but you also don’t want to feel pressured to do everything. Do I have to
donate to a family I have never met? Do I need to stop and make small talk with
everyone every day? I always leave with a guilty feeling; I have no idea why!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I am lucky that I make my own
hours and can work from anywhere at any time. This flexibility has been immensely
helpful in this time of chaos. But when 5:30pm rolls around, you will find me
babbling and playing with my little guy and that will always be the best part
of my day.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<!--EndFragment--><br /></div>
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-6068165403749665952018-05-10T20:57:00.001-04:002018-06-05T10:45:50.975-04:00Motherhood: the good, the bad and the ugly<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">On Feb, 14 my life changed forever. My husband and I
welcomed our beautiful son, Raza Ashraf Syed. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Becoming a mom is an indescribable feeling. It is one of
most selfless things women undertake. The love I feel for him is unlike any
other love I have ever felt before. The first time I heard him cry, I cried. My
heart literally feels like it is walking outside of my body. I want to do
everything humanly possible to protect this little person while also making
sure I am doing everything the right way for his future success. This comes with
a lot of cheek cuddles and lots and lots horrible singing and baby talk. Nothing
can top the first time Raza looked right at me and smiled.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">But the first two weeks are hard. Really hard. I called them
the zombie phase. They are such a test. The constant cycle of feed, burp, and
diaper change make you realize why sleep deprivation is a form of torture. But
once I came out of this phase I could see the light at the end of the tunnel.
And really started believing that I could be a mom, maybe even a good one.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Physically, I am still recovering from bringing this little
human in to the world and am now also responsible for keeping him alive without
a manual! Every night I wear a wrist brace on my right arm because it now hurts
from carrying the weight of my son. My husband helped me sit up every morning for
weeks because I didn’t have the strength to do it on my own after delivering
via c-section. I am immensely lucky because I had help. My mom came down for
six weeks and my husband stayed home for four weeks. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">As a result, the daunting became manageable and we figured
it out together. Single mothers are my heroes. Many women don’t have help or don’t feel comfortable
asking. In fact, not only do they do this alone but one in five also suffer
from post-partum depression. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">But seventy percent of these moms suffer silently and don’t seek
treatment. Why might that be? Well we are a pretty judgmental society. We make
women feel like they are lacking something or something is wrong with them if
they haven’t <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>figured out how to handle
it all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have had plenty of moments where
I have cried because my baby wont stop crying or because all I desperately want
is a 30 minute nap. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Motherhood isn’t all
about cute babies and perfect women.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Sadly, mothers also experience a lot of judgement from other
mothers. Did you get a c-section or deliver naturally? Do you breastfeed or use
formula? We don’t really take the time to learn why women make the decisions
they do. But we critique them for those decisions. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">One of these decisions is going back to work. Some of us
have the luxury of deciding. Others have no option but to go back. This week
was my first full week back at work. I have immense guilt that I reconcile with
on a daily basis. I believe a happy woman is a better mom and for me my
happiness comes from my son and my work. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial";">Out of all of the 41 OECD countries the US is the only one that does not mandate any paid leave for new parents. </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">Only about 16% of employers offer fully paid maternity leave
in the US. And that is for full time employees. I had six weeks paid and six weeks unpaid. We wonder why women are
absent at the top of corporate America? I think the answer isn’t really that
difficult. You have to value care-giving. When Google increased its paid leave
from three to five months, the rate of female turnover after maternity leave
reduced by 50%.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Paid family leave is also a good business practice. It
increases retention and productivity. While researching examples for this talk,
I came across Patagonia’s policies. They are the crown jewel of family leave.
They implemented paid family leave 33 years ago and offer a child care facility
on site. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For some, the cost of child
care alone often leads them to stay at home. Three decades later they proudly celebrate
the fact that 100% of their female employees who have had children came back. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Some of you may know Donna Orender, former President of the
WNBA. She shared a story with me from her days as a new mother of twins. She was
meeting with a Canadian executive on a major tv rights negotiation with
Canadian broadcasters. She couldn’t get a sitter so the twins came to the
meeting too. The boys were quiet but you could smell their diapers! Donna remained
calm and secured the deal, using the smelly diapers as a negotiating ploy. The
exec laughed and they have a great photo to commemorate the meeting. They are
now great friends because of that meeting! I love that story.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Don’t be embarrassed or afraid. You have to be willing to
normalize child rearing and still live your life. Raza has attended meetings
with me. I have nursed him in these meetings. I have made it a point to talk
about my new reality by being honest and by writing and in the process
hopefully removing the stigma that all mothers have it all figured out. This
has also been immensely therapeutic for me. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">I was recently in Miami for a leadership program and chose
to leave Raza behind with my husband. Because I am breastfeeding this meant
creating a pumping schedule. Over the course of three days, I would have to disappear
for multiple 30 minute chunks. Any time someone asked where I went, I proudly said
I had to pump. Most of the men didn’t quite understand the undertaking and were
astonished. But they now know. Share the good, bad and the ugly. Not just the
baby photos. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">Someone recently told me I make motherhood look easy. They
implied that I have it all. What does having it all really mean? For me that
means always having spit up in my hair, being in a constant state of
frazzlement and feeling like I will never catch up. Maybe just maybe, if we
stop pretending like everything is perfect, our workplaces will listen and
American society will catchup.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: small;">No woman truly has it all. They have help. They have a
village. They have become comfortable with the uncomfortable and they have
figured out what works best for them and their family. </span></span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: small;">So on this Mother’s Day don’t just send your mom a card and
flowers, call her and tell her a story because you are her greatest gift and
the best reward is seeing that you turned out ok because you know she is always
going to worry about you.</span></div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-13524175952703682302018-04-30T22:22:00.002-04:002018-04-30T22:44:08.171-04:00C-Section Awareness Month<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br />
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April is Cesearian Awareness Month. Raza was born via
c-section. I got a lot of comments on how awful c-sections are and very few
questions about why this was the route I was taking. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Two years ago Asghar and I started trying to conceive and
were emotionally devastated each month when we knew we had failed yet again. I
started getting tested for different things and was labeled as
"infertile" for insurance purposes. This was not only humiliating but
also emotionally heartbreaking. No one could explain why. And this cold,
sterile word had also led me to believe that I would never carry a child. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Our next option was IVF. It was these fertility experts who
very quickly realized that I wasn't "infertile" but was carrying a 12 cm fibroid that was blocking anything from entering my uterus. I was
thrilled to have an actual reason! And I was really angry because this should
have been detected months ago. All the medical staff kept asking me,
"didn't I feel the pain" but like most women, I just assumed this was
a normal part of womanhood. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
The doctors scheduled my Myomectomy (removal of fibroids)
within weeks of the diagnosis. And six weeks after the surgery, I was pregnant.
The proximity of my pregnancy with my surgery pretty much confirmed that I had
to have a c-section because of the high risk of bleeding. I personally didn't care how I would have a baby, I was
just elated that I was going to have one. However, others constantly felt the
need to remind me that I was missing out on something special. That I needed to
get other opinions until I found a doctor who would let me have a natural
birth. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
One, I always want the option that keeps both me and
the baby healthy. In this case, this was a c-section. Two, while I
understand that some women really want a natural birth experience, it shouldn't
be assumed that all of us do. Three, it is somebody else's body and
therefore let them make the decision that is best for them.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Because it was scheduled, I
got to choose my delivery date. Between Feb 13 and Feb 14, Valentine's day was
a no brainer. I was also emotionally, physically and mentally prepared for what was
to come because I had time to process what was about to happen and when. Some might feel that I lost out on
something really beautiful and special but I don't think I did. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
The experience was beautiful and special for me. Asghar and
I made a playlist and it was extremely comforting to hear each and every song
as I laid on the operating table. I had my husband beside me, holding my hand
while my doctor walked me through what was happening. Hearing Raza's
first cry was the most beautiful sound I have ever heard. And it was made even
more special because of the song he chose for his arrival into this world.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
The method through which Raza arrived makes no difference to
the fact that he is my son and I am his mother. I still get to clean his
diapers, feed him, get unsolicited and solicited advice on how to raise my
child and questions on when I'll loose my baby weight. Let's remember that we already have plenty of things to fight for as women. We don't need to fight each other, make one another feel like less of a woman because of how we gave birth. We need to celebrate and uplift each other. Each birth is a life changing, sacrificial journey and we need all the help we can get. <o:p></o:p></div>
<!--EndFragment--><br /></div>
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-47833235170066885142018-04-20T00:32:00.001-04:002018-04-20T09:57:30.698-04:00Paving The Way<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;">This week’s headlines included:
"Ms. Duckworth, has made history, by becoming the first senator to give
birth while in office." </span><span style="font-size: 12pt;">“Jacinda Ardern will be only the second elected leader to give birth while in office, and the first to go on maternity leave.”</span></div>
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In case you are wondering, the first elected leader to give
birth while in office was Pakistan’s late prime minister, Benazir Bhutto. She
set the precedent in 1990. I am thankful to these bold leaders for taking a
stand and normalizing something that should have been accepted decades
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Motherhood is one of the oldest, most important jobs in the
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I only have two full weeks left before I return to work full
time. Maternity leave has been bitter sweet for me. I have loved my time with
Raza. And I have also witnessed how alienating the world can be for mothers.
Restaurants tell you, <i>no you can’t come with an infant.</i> The
fanciest of hotels are not equipped with changing tables. You breastfeed in
bathrooms because there is no other option. And to top it off, you receive constant judgement. It is exhausting. But you make it all work (with a lot of help) because your love for your child comes above anything else. <o:p></o:p></div>
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There are 85 million mothers in the United States. With that
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-84337713251000797142018-04-10T21:05:00.000-04:002018-04-10T21:21:11.575-04:00When it rains, it pours<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br />
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Today
was my first full day away from Raza. Today was also a jam packed day. Today
also served as an important test drive before I leave for Miami on Thursday for
three days.</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I
had a series of meetings that were all important to me and I was determined to
make it to all of them. I literally had to be in three places at once! A
conference call from 11-12:15, a live event that required setup, catering and
opening remarks from 10-1, and another meeting at a different venue from 1-4.
Oh and I also had to pump. I got pretty creative and somehow it all worked
out. I was a frazzled, frantic mess but apparently it didn’t look like it from
the outside.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">None
of it would have been possible without my mom. She came back to help us for
another three weeks. She has been my saving grace. Raza adores her and she is
so patient with all of us. I had no worries about leaving him at home because I
knew he was with someone who loves him. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I also
asked for help. There is no way I could do everything, do it well and remain
sane. I am fortunate enough to have a wonderful group of friends. When you ask
for help, they show up. And they did just that today. Three of them. In the
pouring rain. They helped with registration, lunches and running the microphone
for questions. All were last minute requests because things happen and others
had to cancel. I could trust them to do the job and do it well and as a result
I had fewer things to worry about it on my never ending list of things to do. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I
was also honest. If someone asked how I was doing, I would tell them I am good
but frazzled. I am by no means perfect and don’t want to pretend to be. The
reality is we all make it work but how we get there is a messy squiggly line. Case and point: I started my day with spit up
on my shirt and didn’t even notice it until I had arrived to the first event. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">My
first event was with 75 eager women who wanted to learn from five all stars on
women in leadership. Each panelist was vulnerable and honest about the
challenges they faced, the sponsors that helped them, the tribe that celebrated
them and most importantly that they could not have done it alone. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It
was fitting that this event kicked off my day. It was a much needed reminder
that we need to make choices, we need to believe in ourselves and we need to
surround ourselves with people that uplift us. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I
ended my day with a phone call from one of my mentors. I didn’t know it but I
needed this impromptu therapy session. Her advice: life will forever be a
balancing act from now on and I need to trust my instincts in deciding what I
truly need to do and when it is ok to say no but the guilt will never
completely go away and that’s ok.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I
am constantly learning about what it means to be a mom. So far I know that mothers
make it all work. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are always
frazzled. They harbor endless mom guilt. They multitask. They show up. Even if
it rains. My cure for the guilt involved 90 minutes of play time with my
munchkin which left me feeling like the luckiest person in the world every time
he smiled at me. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Closing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Message Header"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Salutation"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Date"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Block Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Hyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="FollowedHyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Document Map"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Plain Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="E-mail Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Top of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Bottom of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal (Web)"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Acronym"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Cite"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Code"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Definition"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Keyboard"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Preformatted"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Sample"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Typewriter"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Variable"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal Table"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation subject"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="No List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Contemporary"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Elegant"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Professional"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Balloon Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Theme"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 6"/>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-82448945090271030532018-04-02T22:51:00.000-04:002018-04-02T23:24:17.004-04:00Weddings with an Infant <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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My brother-in-law’s wedding
reception was this past Saturday. As a result, we had a fun, jam-packed couple
of days with family from the US, Canada and Pakistan. I am not going to lie; I
had been a nervous wreck leading up to the festivities because of Raza. There were
a lot of events to attend even when we only planned to attend the ones we
absolutely had to! <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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My biggest concerns were germs,
feedings and attire.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Raza turns seven weeks old on
Wednesday. So naturally, him catching something from one of the many adults who
can’t help but kiss him or grab his cheeks was a real concern. I had a whole
plan of how I would gently tell people that it is flu season and we would
rather be safe than sorry. I figured it was a little too invasive to flat out
ask, “did you get your flu shot?” or “I know I haven’t seen you in years but
have you picked up smoking?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I did however, naively, believe
that people would be accustomed to sanitizing their hands or offer to wash
their hands first. Nope. Not the case. People just want him right away. And my
hesitation to give him was sometimes received with sadness and other times with
confusion, as if it was their right. <span style="font-size: 12pt;">I found it really tough to
navigate this. Part of it is my anxiety to ensure that I am doing all I can to
protect my kid. And part of it is navigating culture norms like </span><i style="font-size: 12pt;">we didn’t do any of this with you guys and
you all turned out fine so relax. </i><span style="font-size: 12pt;">Both are valid. So where do you draw the
line?</span></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Next feedings. I pumped in
advance and had bottles ready for him. But no matter how much you plan,
something always goes awry. We give him a bottle once or twice a week so he is
adjusted for daycare. Well of course at the reception, he hated the
bottle. But to be fair to him, we also had trouble sticking to his schedule. Hot
water in a hotel is not as readily available as you may think! At one point, I just
gave up and nursed him while getting my make-up done in a room full of
strangers. Now that is something I never thought I would do but hey, your kid
always comes first.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Now naturally, Raza had an
adorable outfit lined up for each occasion. I, on the other hand, had to think
about access for pumping and/or nursing and if my outfit would scratch my child while I held him and that made everything seem inappropriate.
What South Asian outfit could I possibly wear that would allow me to nurse, be
comfortable and also be part of the bridal party? My mom and I differed on the
answer but found a middle ground. The bottom line is that it was all
uncomfortable and I just had to roll with it and make it work. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Despite the challenges, it was
wonderful to catch up with family and introduce everyone to our little guy. I
definitely learned more about my boundaries. But I also learned a lot more
about troubleshooting with an infant and am so glad we all survived.<br />
<br />
Oh and the only reason we have a picture is because my mom insisted we take one and I'm glad she did because it is literally the only one of the three us from three events. <o:p></o:p></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7w7MnkvUyGoS5xJ9qmPfGgw43bPzQk7nNFwnAoBKLXSbXLWV6TUOv-S9yfqu1wE2bZQRyMqLvmwkf4G5nDdNAtvYXwjkQliD8Y_yoZa-5mPWkegorAvK-K4p9kj-aJ2eMdboCTyRaU-t2/s1600/IMG_5111.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7w7MnkvUyGoS5xJ9qmPfGgw43bPzQk7nNFwnAoBKLXSbXLWV6TUOv-S9yfqu1wE2bZQRyMqLvmwkf4G5nDdNAtvYXwjkQliD8Y_yoZa-5mPWkegorAvK-K4p9kj-aJ2eMdboCTyRaU-t2/s200/IMG_5111.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The adorable outfit was swapped for jammies</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<!--EndFragment--><br /></div>
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-85237807705610810862018-03-26T22:20:00.000-04:002018-03-27T11:28:22.894-04:00Happiness & Relaxation <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br />
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While I was pregnant, I tried to
stay as active as possible up until Raza’s birth. People kept telling me to
relax and that I was crazy for showing up to meetings and events. Their
statements implied that I was showing up for others and didn’t need to exert
myself in that way. But what they were failing to realize was that I was
showing up for myself.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
You see my happiness comes from
my productivity. I feel at peace when I know I have done something to help my
loved ones, to further issues I care about and completed my to do list at work
and at home. While I enjoy my facials and massages, I’m not really sure my definition of relaxation is the same as
the universal definition of relaxation. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Needless to say, this hasn’t
changed after having Raza. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I was emailing the day after
having Raza and participating in a panel three weeks after his birth. Once
again, I started hearing comments like “don’t worry about this, you should be
home”, “you need to relax” and “enjoy time with your baby.” I know these
statements come from a good place. But they also imply that I am doing something wrong. Why am I expected to stop doing the things that I enjoy? If I can make it work, then let me. Women already have to navigate the loss of their social calendars and certain friendships as a result of becoming pregnant and a mom. And don't even get me started on the fact that this conversation isn't even an issue for dads.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Don’t get me wrong, I have days of zero energy. But if I feel good then I want to go about my day as I would have with or without a child and whether I am pregnant or not. In both instances, I listen to
my body and my doctor first and foremost. If neither object, then I move forward.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I love spending time
with Raza. When he is up, he has my undivided attention. But Raza also sleeps close to fourteen hours a day and feeds for three to four hours a day. That
leaves plenty of time for me to actually do other things like check emails, attend
meetings, make phone calls..you get the point. This is where keeping track of
his schedule comes in very handy. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
More importantly, it helps me
find a balance between my new and old identities. Women already have to navigate hormones and changing bodies while they are trying to figure out how to raise a child. <span style="font-size: 12pt;">Outlets for intellectual stimulation
are rare at this stage unless we make it a point to make this a priority. It
is definitely a priority of mine.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
We should stop assuming that
there is one uniform approach to pregnancy or motherhood because there isn’t. No
one should be made to feel like they aren’t doing enough or are a bad parent
because they decide to spend time with someone or something other than their
child. As always, each mama, each baby and each circumstance are different. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<!--EndFragment--><br /></div>
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-62696791693750947312018-03-18T16:04:00.001-04:002018-03-18T16:58:58.561-04:00My new normal<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
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<br />
As a first time parent, you end up doing things that you never thought you’d
do. I am going to assume this is really the case for all parents and not just
us newbies. These things vary in grossness and silliness. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Singing. I know I can’t sing. But I know Raza likes music
and when I sing to him. I also know I sound ridiculous singing Hakuna Matata
but I do it for the smiles and nap time. So far, I’m the only lucky recipient of these smiles and I love it.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Speaking of sounds, you also discover the power of sounds.
My kid can sleep through Timon and Pumbaa singing Hakuna Matata but he will
wake up right away at the sound of my phone charger hitting the floor. What’s
the difference? I have no idea! Every time Raza sleeps, you will find me
intentionally not flushing the toilet and tippy toeing around him. If he
happens to be in my arms while sleeping, I’ll grab things with my feet and
stretch in ways I didn’t know I could. Him sleeping is good for my
sanity and I don’t care if I look ridiculous in the process.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Documentation. For starters, you have to document every time they go and feed the first few days in the hospital to ensure all is well with
their digestive tract. We did this for about a week and then stopped because it
was too cumbersome. But then at his one-month checkup his
pediatrician asked how often Raza was eating, sleeping, pooping and I had no
idea. With little sleep, you barely remember the time, let alone
what happened two hours ago. And so now I use the Glow Baby app and document
everything. I know it sounds like a lot but it’s actually really useful. I am starting to see his patterns. This helps immensely in planning
my outings and meetings.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Then there is your comfort with pee and poop. You
become very comfortable with the two. You will get peed on. How
often will obviously depend on your baby's gender..we have had multiple times in one
day. Have you ever heard of fluffing out a diaper? I hadn’t. And I had changed
many diapers before! I discovered this after Raza peed on our friend while
wearing a diaper. It turns out this is pretty common for newborns. You should always fluff out the diaper. Of course there are still accidents that
happen after bath time or when you are changing their outfits. Like yesterday,
he peed on my newly washed sheets while I was changing him on the bed. Rookie
mistake. But you can’t always dress them on the changing table. What did I do?
I used some wipes on both of us, spot treated the sheets and called it a day.
It isn’t possible to give him a bath after each time or find the time for
me to shower after every accident. Just like it isn’t possible to always sleep when
the baby sleeps (worst advice ever).<o:p></o:p></div>
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You win some and you lose some. My new normal is just
that, mine. Like each pregnancy, like each child: everyone is different. You have to stay calm and handle each situation with humor and patience.
Babies can sense your stress and it only stresses them out so there is no
point. Get plenty of cheek cuddles afterwards and everything will be
alright.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-88459763221495988212018-03-12T22:21:00.001-04:002018-03-18T16:13:20.881-04:00Becoming a mom<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Message Header"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Salutation"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Date"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Block Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Hyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="FollowedHyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Document Map"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Plain Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="E-mail Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Top of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Bottom of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal (Web)"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Acronym"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Cite"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Code"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Definition"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Keyboard"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Preformatted"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Sample"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Typewriter"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Variable"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal Table"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation subject"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="No List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Contemporary"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Elegant"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Professional"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Balloon Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Theme"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Raza turns a month old on Friday. A
month! To say the past four weeks have flown by would be an understatement. The
days do go quickly but when you are doing the same thing over and over again
you also forget the date, the time, the day of the week. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Becoming a parent is unlike
anything else in this world. The emotions that come with it are the most
powerful and consume all of you, more than you even thought you had to give. I
experienced so much despite the never ending cycle of feeding, burping, changing
and napping. The term zombie took on a whole new meaning during those first two
weeks. It didn’t really matter if I ate, showered, changed. It was all about
Raza. No matter how much you read, what others have told you, nothing really
prepares you for it until you are in it.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
For starters, I am now
responsible for another human! What I do with him, shapes his future. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
The first few weeks are
excruciatingly painful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That immense
sense of responsibility definitely takes its toll. It is physically taxing!
After all, this cute little human did come out of me. Simple things like
getting out of bed, sitting up and down become a huge task. I had to have
Asghar give me a hand because my lower body strength did not exist. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I became a food source. The
female body is capable of so many monumental things that it is
incomprehensible. Raza and I, luckily, figured out a rhythm early on. But I
wont lie, breastfeeding was the thing I was scared of the most. I and only I
could do this for him. And I needed to do it every two hours, really it ends up being every 45 minutes,<span style="font-size: 12pt;"> in those first two
weeks. The time starts from the
start time, not the end time. Who knew. But it is also a beautiful moment that
only he and I share and I wouldn’t change a thing about it.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
There are so many diapers.
For an eight-pound human, this kid can eat and there are dirty diapers beyond
your wildest dreams. When people said we would need 300 diapers for the
first month, I laughed. Turns out, it’s true. And with diapers come wipes, butt
paste, diaper pails, liners, diaper bag and all these things that you become
familiar with really quickly. You learn by trial and error. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
There are no plans. Right
before Raza’s first doctor’s visit, he had a meltdown and peed on himself as we were about to head out. We had these grandiose plans that we would take a
leisurely stroll with him to the appointment. But in reality, we drove, left the
house one minute before the appointment and looked like a deer had hit us when
we arrived. We also arrived without our diaper bag. He of course, dirtied his
diaper during the short two minutes from when we left the house and when we
arrived. The nurse asked us to change him and Asghar and I just looked at each other like we
failed. She smiled and gave us a diaper and some wipes. Since then we have
learned that the diaper bag goes everywhere and that plans are lofty goals but
reality is something different. We just need to go with the flow.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Everyone wants to visit
the baby. Yes, they want to say hi to me too but they really want to stare at
him. Which is totally fine because he is adorable. But on some days that is a lot when you haven’t gotten out of your pajamas and feel like a Whitewalker. For someone who is always organized, in meetings and doing things, this one was
hard. I had to tell people no. There are good days and bad days. And on bad
days, I can't muster up the energy to dress up and be on. I just need to
be in my own comfortable state with my baby. Having said that, for me it is important to wash up and get dressed. It changes my attitude right away. And
when I don’t, it makes me sad and feel sorry for myself for no reason. I’m
still trying to find the balance and do this everyday. Eventually, I hope we
get out of the house everyday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I was lucky. I had help the first
four weeks. My mom came to stay with us for three weeks and Asghar took four
weeks off. This week is my first week alone with Raza. We are still figuring
things out but it has gotten better and easier. I have the utmost respect and
admiration for single moms. I have no idea how they do it all alone. I can’t
imagine experiencing the past four weeks on my own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t write this to scare anyone. It’s
more for me to process that we brought a human into this world. In my opinion,
parenthood is the best and most important thing in the world. It is beautiful
and magical but it is also tough and painful. I am lucky enough to have close
girlfriends that tell me the truth whenever I have a question. Magical doesn’t
always mean cute faces and cuddles. And that’s ok. The cute faces and cuddles
do make it all worth it. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<!--EndFragment--><br /></div>
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-25286485862082366212016-08-28T22:55:00.000-04:002016-08-28T22:55:21.061-04:00Women's Equality Day<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">This week was special, albeit heavy.</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"> </span></span><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">While highlighting the successes and the importance of women's equality, it reminded me of what feels like a never ending struggle.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">On Tuesday, I saw my local community rally behind one woman because of her courage and bravery. Hope McMath has chosen to continuously fight for equity and inclusion. The support she received and the hope she provides has been a beautiful thing to watch. </span></span><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">It is a powerful testament of our faith in her and our love for her. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">On Wednesday, I was one of 25 women who received the Jacksonville Business Journal's "Women of Influence" award. </span>I was thrilled to see many men in the audience! Usually, events for women draw a predominantly female crowd. </span><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">I had the pleasure of meeting many of the past recipients and was humbled by their accomplishments. They are pioneers who have paved the way for other women and continue to do so through their tireless efforts. </span><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">As one of the youngest recipients of the award, I understand the responsibility placed on me to continue to positively impact our community. You can read my profile for the award </span><a href="http://www.bizjournals.com/jacksonville/news/2016/08/26/women-of-influence-sabeen-perwaiz-of-florida.html?ana=RSS%26s=" style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;" target="_blank">here</a><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">On Thursday, TEDxJacksonville held Women Kicking Ass, one of our most popular events. The event sold out in under an hour, demonstrating the need for this important conversation. The panelists were authentic and honest. They provided great insight on what it means to be a leader in your community, your sector, or your organization. They advocated for women to actively pursue their goals. Most importantly, they reiterated that ceilings can be shattered. </span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Friday was Women's Equality Day. </span></span><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">In 1971, we designated August 26 Women's Equality Day to commemorate the 19th amendment, passed in 1920 to grant women the right to vote. The first Women's Rights Convention was held in Seneca Falls on July 19, 1848. It took us 72 years to earn the right to vote. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">On Saturday, I exercised my right to vote and took my nieces, who are ages 11 ad 14, to the polls with me. </span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Seneca Falls was a milestone. The 19th amendment was a milestone. Our recognition of Women's Equality was a milestone. </span></span><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">But it baffles me that women are still fighting for equality in 2016 after proving ourselves time and time again. Headlines like, "Facebook, Microsoft, Apple say they offer equal pay" are mind blowing because women have already proven the economics of women's equality. Research has shown conclusively that the more gender-equal companies are, the happier their labor force is. They have lower job turnover. They have an easier time recruiting. They have higher rates of retention, higher job satisfaction, and higher rates of productivity.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">We are headed in the right direction. We should celebrate every step forward. But we are far from equality and there is a lot more work to be done. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-83415824223764534132016-04-02T09:49:00.002-04:002016-04-02T09:49:19.035-04:00Before there were blogs<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I woke up today to sounds of rain and thunder and decided to
spend my morning reading and writing, two things I enjoy immensely when I have the time. Today, I'm going to be writing a journal entry to my childhood best friend in a book we have been sharing since 2012. While reading some of the past entries, I decided to also look back at my past travels. In doing so, I discovered old emails I used to send to a group of about 25 of my
closest friends and family. They bring back such fond memories of
laughter, love and adventure. I don't know why I stopped so I am also going to write one today after five years. I thought I would share one with all of you from New Year's Day 2011.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
1/1/11</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Hi everyone,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Firstly, Happy New Year!!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
The last two weeks have been an absolute gastronomical
delight for me and full of unexpected adventures.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
We were stuck indoors because England is still learning how
to cope with snow, i.e. a usual 2 hour journey from Birmingham to London took
us 15 hours. On the bright side, my mom cooked everything my heart desired and
it came to the point that we began to only partake in eating and sleeping.
While staying with an uncle in London, I also continued to meet more delightful
family that have now made me want to reach out to distant relatives and
reconnect because I have learned that family doesn't always come with drama. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I had the honor of spending Christmas and New Year with two
beautiful families, the Khorugdharry's in London and the Suarez's in Bilbao.
Both welcomed me into their homes and were kind enough to allow me to witness
their traditions. In London, I even got entrusted to help cook the xmas meal!
And it has to be said that the food was delicious and I'm sure our capabilities
surprised everyone at the table. It was also a pleasure to see little Tahj open
his presents and play with his new drum set for us, there is nothing like
seeing the magic of xmas from a child's perspective.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
In Bilbao, the celebrations for New Year's lasted into the
next evening and definitely tested my endurance! Not only did I get to
experience the annual countdown with a grape eating competition but prior to
that the matriarch of the house was kind enough to cook an amazing meal while
being careful to take care of everyone's dietary needs. We then went on to the
seaside village of Pedernales to continue the festivities. Here, a beautiful 84
year old grandmother invited us all to celebrate at her home and taught me that
life needs to be lived with romance or else it isn't worth it at all.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I am looking forward to seeing the city of Bilbao and San
Sebastian in the new few days while taking time out to eat as many Pinxtos as
possible because they are absolutely delicious. Apparently, San Sebastian is
famous for Pinxtos and has 16 Michelin star restaurants so my plans to diet are
going to have to wait. Over the course of my travels in the last few weeks, I
have met many wonderful people and visited many beautiful cities while
partaking in new experiences and am now looking forward to being in New York
next week! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Until Peru..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Love,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Sabeen</div>
</div>
Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-2224680416361732192015-10-04T14:29:00.000-04:002015-10-04T17:21:03.353-04:00Monthly Dose of Travel on The Chat<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I firmly believe travel teaches us valuable life lessons in ways we never expect. It has allowed me to fall in love with the world, see and believe that we are all the same irrespective of where we were born or raised and most importantly it has allowed me to appreciate different perspectives.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
If you follow Humans of New York, then you have to come to see that it doesn't matter if you live in New York or Karachi, humans are the same everywhere. Negative news stories tend to take over the airwaves and we rarely hear about good that takes place everyday. When we experience the world for ourselves, we see that stereotypes are often not true and people are inherently good. I believe this is the reason platforms like Airbnb, Couchsurfing and Uber are successful. Strangers are the best part of travel because they make you realize what humility really means. They are the ones who invite you in and offer you a feast even though they don't have much to give.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnix0LTqssKOJgRRK4Wr3rD7U64aSVEobyOY1nWGz5GcBEMG17omcaRZL7ItqTjYaBbyb4oFpeAztwEw7ymHDQ7O_N0DAmGFN2nkyfYXCnBHKU5ryIe98slvT2qTTypV9ibus9YkhYljTc/s1600/chat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="174" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnix0LTqssKOJgRRK4Wr3rD7U64aSVEobyOY1nWGz5GcBEMG17omcaRZL7ItqTjYaBbyb4oFpeAztwEw7ymHDQ7O_N0DAmGFN2nkyfYXCnBHKU5ryIe98slvT2qTTypV9ibus9YkhYljTc/s320/chat.jpg" width="320" /></a>I was on The Chat back in August to discuss my love for travel and had a great time with the ladies. It was just like chatting with a group of girlfriends. <span style="text-align: left;">Oddly enough, they invited me back a month later to discuss fall travel destinations. </span>Starting in November, I'll be on once a month to discuss holidays around the world! I am so grateful for the invite and for their faith in me. My hope for the monthly segment is to use it as a tool to raise awareness for the different cultures present in Jacksonville. We have many different nationalities amongst us but we do very little to incorporate them into the community. </div>
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I'd love to hear about which holidays from other parts of the world have made an impression on you. I have a list from my travels and can't wait to start sharing them with you. Watch The Chat weekends at 3 p.m. on NBC12 and ABC25.</div>
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If you would like to watch the previous two interviews, you can do so with the links below.<br />
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<a href="http://www.firstcoastnews.com/videos/entertainment/television/programs/the-chat/2015/08/12/the-chat-wednesday-august-12th-travel-with-sabeen-perwaiz/31553655/">http://www.firstcoastnews.com/videos/entertainment/television/programs/the-chat/2015/08/12/the-chat-wednesday-august-12th-travel-with-sabeen-perwaiz/31553655/</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.firstcoastnews.com/videos/entertainment/television/programs/the-chat/2015/09/18/72425150/">http://www.firstcoastnews.com/videos/entertainment/television/programs/the-chat/2015/09/18/72425150/</a><br />
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-75395160760598479652015-07-17T19:03:00.000-04:002015-07-18T08:31:42.246-04:00What is Eid?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Today marked the first day of Eid ul Fitr, a celebration that marks the end of a long month of fasting for 1.6 billion Muslims around the world. I sometimes describe it as the Muslim Christmas to my friends in Jacksonville because very few know about it despite the 10,000 plus Muslim population in Jacksonville.<br />
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I look forward to this holiday even though I am not a devout Muslim because it reminds me about who I am and where I am come from. This is probably my loneliest Eid because my parents are in Canada and my in-laws are in Dubai. My mom always mails me a care package of food so I cant taste the goodness I would get at home but with her being away I got nothing. My in-laws call Jacksonville home and when they are in town, they always make sure our family gets together for Eid prayer and a family celebration afterwards. This year, I worked on Eid and Asghar has been prepping for a deposition so we didn't partake in any festivities. <br />
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This holiday also gives me an excuse to raid my SouthAsian closet, courtesy of my mom. That's right, when SouthAsian girls get married they get a wardrobe full of clothes as a gift from their parents. But I didn't get dressed up this year and it makes me sad.<br />
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Jacksonville, FL is a very southern town in the bible belt. My friends from around the world and New York always wish me Eid Mubarak on this day but none from my now hometown ever do. I don't blame them for it but I do wish they would take the time out to learn more about the different cultures around them. Discussing Islam in this town can be a controversial topic even if I see myself as a liberal muslim/agnostic. I do think I have a responsibility to share my identity but am never sure when to bring it up.<br />
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So the point of the post is come ask me about where I am from and who I am :)<br />
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-80247437190406105402015-06-28T11:19:00.000-04:002015-06-28T11:24:14.678-04:00World Travelistas<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Angie Orth and I were recently interviewed by First Coast Magazine for their July bucket list issue. The interview focused on our love of travel and why it is an important component of our life. Grab the issue at your local Northeast Florida bookstore! You can also read the interview <a href="http://firstcoastmagazine.com/news/world-travelistas/" target="_blank">here</a>. </span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcEDmsrV8l1Il8sumFUmKv9bP1qR-HZk1Yy5nAi0H6gOZ7-07vQZzKqYuKVi_HJoFhoa88miI8FxH-C9nxhJV6Z6gvL8_OiBXEItL1niiiWkSAVzSE8VJoOE70CO3WmAOWN5On2W02Fq0i/s1600/travelistas1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="215" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcEDmsrV8l1Il8sumFUmKv9bP1qR-HZk1Yy5nAi0H6gOZ7-07vQZzKqYuKVi_HJoFhoa88miI8FxH-C9nxhJV6Z6gvL8_OiBXEItL1niiiWkSAVzSE8VJoOE70CO3WmAOWN5On2W02Fq0i/s400/travelistas1.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo by Renee Parenteau</td></tr>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-1129381138071942312015-06-24T19:28:00.001-04:002015-06-24T21:10:22.936-04:00My Trip To Vietnam<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="color: #999999;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">There are many
things I could tell you about my trip to Vietnam. The chaotic border control. The
pho in Hanoi. The beauty of Halong Bay. The colorful streets of Hoi An. The </span>chaotic<span style="font-family: inherit;"> dance of the scooters. The importance of the Mekong delta. But I am going to start by focusing on the
people who accompanied me and how they turned a vacation into a memorable
moment of my life.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Cambodia and
Vietnam are neighbors. I started hearing about Vietnam as soon as I moved to
Cambodia. My local friends, colleagues and neighbors would voluntarily disclose
how awful the Vietnamese people were and how they changed Cambodia' glorious
trajectory and stole all the limelight for themselves instead of sharing it
with the region. I listened with skepticism but knew that some of the
differences between these beautiful countries were deep rooted and dated back
to Pol Pot and Cambodia's real demise.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">A lot of my friends
made the trip to Ho Chi Minh pretty regularly because it was only six
hours from Phnom Penh. I assumed I would make a weekend trip pretty early into my six-month stint but my trip to Vietnam ended up taking place
during my last month in Asia. Parts of me wanted to go straight home from
Vietnam, parts of me wanted Vietnam to be the start of a month of travel in
Asia before I said goodbye to the enchanting continent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">But things end up
working out exactly as they should. My best friend and serial travel partner
decided to visit me during my last month in Asia. He and I started our exploration of the world together and have stories that will bind us forever. We
planned 10 days of travel in Vietnam and it felt like another one of our
adventures all over again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Meanwhile, my
cousin, Saima, and her husband, Arzi, also decided to join me in Vietnam before I
moved back home. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She and I
coincidentally always meet in a new country. So far we have explored England,
India, Singapore and Vietnam together. I last saw her in Singapore over Chinese New
Year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We met somewhat serendipitously when my mom told me I had a cousin in London while I was I was studying
in Birmingham. Of course I didn’t give it any thought until Saima reached out
and we started emailing. Turns out she was really cool! Emails turned into
weekend hangouts until they moved. She has become the big sister I never knew I
had.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">How lucky was I? I
got to explore a new country with the people I love while also being able to
close out a memorable chapter of my life with them. </span><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Our trip was broken
into three parts, the north, the center and the south. We ended up visiting
Hanoi, Halong Bay, Hue, Hoi An, the Mekong Delta and Ho Chi Minh.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK6p02awjodttdogQZlI1impGm0-1U5s2b9jSNXV4dzM5aRKeGeutMAG0zovEycSKoyaQWZJhjjKTGZbfN4ACcS1a02y9NZo9gBoifShTnqoh_8JO0U9fRy8b1YRd65FPLZCpTbPQUEBFV/s1600/IMG_2828.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK6p02awjodttdogQZlI1impGm0-1U5s2b9jSNXV4dzM5aRKeGeutMAG0zovEycSKoyaQWZJhjjKTGZbfN4ACcS1a02y9NZo9gBoifShTnqoh_8JO0U9fRy8b1YRd65FPLZCpTbPQUEBFV/s200/IMG_2828.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigYJvYA4uV8V9qfrcq0TTJgPB0lLNpmFxrOHV0vd_538JXjFU0k5EqEWgb8Nxmnxxsze612w4fcPb6I2lrDzI3rJHJesyxcKPwCQ3PrrTCfqiIwlwZxGwPddPdq32NCx9xH7IZfCquhcMn/s1600/IMG_2883.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigYJvYA4uV8V9qfrcq0TTJgPB0lLNpmFxrOHV0vd_538JXjFU0k5EqEWgb8Nxmnxxsze612w4fcPb6I2lrDzI3rJHJesyxcKPwCQ3PrrTCfqiIwlwZxGwPddPdq32NCx9xH7IZfCquhcMn/s200/IMG_2883.jpg" width="200" /></a><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Hanoi is located in
the north and is the current capital. We spent the first day walking and
getting acclimated to the neighborhoods. Walking is so therapeutic. It allows you to feel like you are part of the pulse of the city. You are amongst
locals and foreigners alike. You get to experience the rich and the poor, the
young and the old. You really get to see a place. Through walking, we discovered
a coffee shop hidden behind a tourist shop. Once we got to the roof, our view
was the city and Hoan Kiem Lake. It was the perfect way to meet the city and
its inhabitants. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Hanoi is the
gateway to Halong Bay. Most tourists start here if they want to visit the bay.
It does have plenty to offer aside from shuttle rides to Hai Phong. There is
fantastic pho, the best you will ever have. I think I had one for every meal one
day because I could not get enough. The Vietnamese also eat pho pretty much at every meal. One of our favorite moments was eating pho for breakfast with the locals. We knew we found a legit place when we saw businessmen in suits sitting on milk crates in the street in the summer heat. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIzHrcYWCldJfaonMLLykJQDhzC-3G0lIDhh3zOrkKErQwfRNG5OnnabvNjX5iXWnPKO7s6rrijhz1gfHFrMp4JqBDlk_TBNkR6SHJISNDP7EzjOXIhqoO_VBHhPLFHz9adz_vaoFgIjoG/s1600/DSC03989.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIzHrcYWCldJfaonMLLykJQDhzC-3G0lIDhh3zOrkKErQwfRNG5OnnabvNjX5iXWnPKO7s6rrijhz1gfHFrMp4JqBDlk_TBNkR6SHJISNDP7EzjOXIhqoO_VBHhPLFHz9adz_vaoFgIjoG/s200/DSC03989.jpg" width="133" /></a><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Ho Chi Minh also lays
here in a creepy mausoleum. I say creepy not because you are going to look at a
dead body. Creepy because of the rules you have to follow. You have to walk in
pairs, you are not allowed to smile, you have to cover your shoulders and your
knees.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We discovered these rules the
hard way. Z and Saima were wearing tank tops and had to buy cheap cotton I love
Vietnam tees in order to enter. These were also over priced. I had to leave my
camera behind with bag check. Nobody was friendly and it was a very robotic
experience. Having said all the negative, seeing Ho Chi Minh lay there with
his black nails is a sight I will never forget. This visit really reminded us
that we were in fact visiting a communist country and need to follow all of its
laws. All the tourist attractions, the French architecture and influence can’t
detract from the fact that everything is very much controlled by the
government. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhz2F1HLD5Fx_D2j-bRW-1e_nYekOM2TiEMYPSKqfhpnJgXbpOlkp1VtwM-GFkqcdC0Gvg034Af8ZkLzsJXbsKS0-R102jI5M9AbNYNRYXGWmTO6I9Vd24Lr1UVoVXCQJYSmhSack-m80Eb/s1600/IMG_2814.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhz2F1HLD5Fx_D2j-bRW-1e_nYekOM2TiEMYPSKqfhpnJgXbpOlkp1VtwM-GFkqcdC0Gvg034Af8ZkLzsJXbsKS0-R102jI5M9AbNYNRYXGWmTO6I9Vd24Lr1UVoVXCQJYSmhSack-m80Eb/s200/IMG_2814.JPG" width="200" /></a><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Our next stop was
Halong Bay. The four-hour ride to Hai Phong was filled with cheesy pit stops
where you are supposed to buy all things Vietnamese. The best part about this
ride was seeing a laborer clean a marble statue with a toothbrush. As for the bay, I had
arranged for us to spend the night on a secluded island call Cat Ba island. It looked beautiful in all of the pictures. I had no idea we would have such
an eventful journey in order to reach it. It took us two speed boats, and a yacht to get there. Had I known that, I probably would have planned to stay
for two nights rather than one. It was in fact an absolutely stunning place in
the middle of nowhere. Literally. No stores. No local residents aside from the
hotel staff. Nothing but eight shacks on an island. They fed us and had kayaks for
us. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsrF-ea2WSPNryjAUenB6CTGw478J8gAXB0a3Z7YtmYrhmHumCMyI3aU_Dd9IRlbVig-3Vk0UHOqXd7LmW-CfHvrBluLaQNM5_kds5VJn5YYS5Pw7FbOYJHmfFknxyLhoFHzK8sQ6ccXko/s1600/DSC03932.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsrF-ea2WSPNryjAUenB6CTGw478J8gAXB0a3Z7YtmYrhmHumCMyI3aU_Dd9IRlbVig-3Vk0UHOqXd7LmW-CfHvrBluLaQNM5_kds5VJn5YYS5Pw7FbOYJHmfFknxyLhoFHzK8sQ6ccXko/s200/DSC03932.JPG" width="200" /></a><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Halong bay was also a
beautiful sight. I have never seen anything like it. It is filled with thousands of towering
limestone islands topped by </span><span style="color: #999999;">rain forests</span><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">. There are plenty of underwater caves
for snorkeling and lots of opportunities for swimming and kayaking. Ironically,
I learned that the boat tours are called “Junk Boat Tours." Most of the boats definitely
aren’t junk boats and I wonder if the name got lost in translation.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">We said goodbye to
Saima and Arzi here and Z and I headed to Hoi An, a shopper’s paradise. Hoi An
was magical. There are bright colors all around you, in the lanterns, on the
streets, on the doors, and of course in the shops. You will fall in love with the iconic silk lanterns that set an ambient glow outside everything, especially when you see them in the river. </span><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Our objective here was to consume as many Banh Mi sandwiches as we could from a local unassuming sandwich
shop. They charge a local </span><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">price and a foreigner price and I am proud to say that we
received the local price on our fourth and final day. These things are
indescribable and each bite was a taste of heaven.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhR4JkRCOWkstOY8x3xaaU6xZk6o715Ttv3ESH3oIYhYl0U6roFV7QtQ1Cx2Xv2rHO4qb1LnV0-mfXe3AyDVHVzOCPzz2TE6zkgdSBTWcVPga9NLDSwJCqCt55kUft1JOCj3EMaFd5E3mzF/s1600/DSC04032.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhR4JkRCOWkstOY8x3xaaU6xZk6o715Ttv3ESH3oIYhYl0U6roFV7QtQ1Cx2Xv2rHO4qb1LnV0-mfXe3AyDVHVzOCPzz2TE6zkgdSBTWcVPga9NLDSwJCqCt55kUft1JOCj3EMaFd5E3mzF/s200/DSC04032.jpg" width="133" /></a><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">The other important
aspect of Hoi An is tailoring. Custom tailoring for everything! Shoes, bags,
suits, dresses, you name it. We got a little crazy and ordered seven suits, two
shoes, two shirts, and one dress. Everything required daily check-ins but in
the end the final products were worth it.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Having had the extra time, we took advantage of Hue's proximity and arranged a private tour of the </span><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">city. Hue is Vietnam's old imperial capital and is only two hours from Hoi An. It has the standard sights like the imperial city and many temples but we loved our excursion because of the Tomb of Khai Dinh. The tomb overlooks a hill and requires you to climb 127 steps before you reach the top. The statues on the first level were the best part for me. Yes, the </span><span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">mausoleum is intricate but the soldiers evoke a certain emotion and I wanted to spend time with each and every one. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">We also took time out for some r&r at the beach. We rented bicycles for the day and explored all of old town and then made our way to the sea . It was wonderful because the beach was filled with </span><span style="color: #999999;">locals rather than tourists. It was a fun way to see their daily routine and we got a beautiful sunset as an added bonus. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #999999; font-family: inherit;">Stay Tuned for part II on Ho Chi Minh, the
Mekong Delta and the Border.</span></div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-84750204281535078272015-05-31T14:20:00.003-04:002015-06-24T19:36:50.923-04:00One Year Since Cambodia <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">It has been nearly two months since my last post. I've been meaning to write but keep getting pulled in lots of different directions. I have a long list of posts to write on Vietnam, Hawaii, Montreal, Asheville and Savannah and I promise to get to them before the summer is over. </span><br />
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While attending a wedding party this weekend, a conversation on Cambodia led me to realize it has been exactly one year since I moved back home. I remember when I was getting ready to move to Asia like it was yesterday. At the time, a lot of my friends were worried I was giving up on the momentum I had achieved and were not sure I was making the right decision for my career. You already know how enriching that experience was for <a href="http://restlesswanderlust.blogspot.com/2014/07/redefining-my-identity.html" target="_blank">me</a>.<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;">The past year has been full of professional and personal development highs for me. I have been working at the Jacksonville Chamber since August and have enjoyed every minute of it. I am managing a cutting edge <a href="http://earnup.org/" target="_blank">project</a> with the goal of improving our region's college attainment rate from 36% to 60% by 2025. You have no idea how baffling this statistic is for all the locals. People just assume everyone goes to college and graduates when in reality more than half don't. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I also recently learned that I am an </span><a href="http://www.aspenideas.org/" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Aspen Ideas Festival </a><span style="font-family: inherit;">Scholar for 2015 and part of </span><a href="http://www.leadershipjax.org/" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Leadership Jacksonville</a><span style="font-family: inherit;"> Class of 2016. Both programs present an opportunity to engage with a dedicated group of leaders, locally, </span>nationally<span style="font-family: inherit;"> and worldwide.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">The amount of support and advice I have received in Jacksonville has been unbelievable. I've said this before and I'll say it again but the women here have helped me in countless ways. They have made themselves available for multiple coffee dates and lots of honest feedback sessions. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />The pressure to be great is huge because I don't want to let anyone down. But it is also the motivation to keep going and to keep setting higher expectations for myself. I have never felt a greater sense of community then I do now in Jacksonville. I am excited to be part of the change and can't wait to see what comes next.</span><br />
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-9735126380330343942015-04-06T09:00:00.001-04:002015-08-02T16:41:05.895-04:00The results of Living on $2/day for a month<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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We did it. We survived an entire month on $2/day for food and drinks. What this really means is we didn’t go out at all in the month of March. </div>
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Our friends didn’t particularly love this idea and were skeptical if we could keep it up. We found creative ways to interact with them without having to go out. This included art walk, morning runs, running the Gate River Run, potluck dinners and movie nights. Many were worried about us starving but the reality is we actually ate really well. We enjoyed cooking at home and figuring out recipes together. Asghar has mastered bread making and stir fry and even gained a few pounds because of his love of fresh bread. I have figured out how to buy groceries in a smart way. I actually lost a few pounds and feel a lot less tired because everything has been fresh and homemade. We now use everything we buy in that week and nothing gets lost in the bottom drawer.<br />
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Asghar would say the whole thing was hokey but a lot of fun. It wasn't a real challenge for him. He doesn't think we did anything difficult because we didn't follow the guidelines strictly. For example, we used our pantry items in addition to the groceries we bought. We had three dinners on the calendar at the homes of friends and family and we didn't cancel them even though purists would say they should have been cancelled or their cost should have been deducted from the budget. He holds himself to such high standards and would only say we accomplished a great deal if we did this project strictly on $2/day.<br />
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I’m sure many of you are wondering if it was all worth it. My answer is a resounding yes, so much so that I am going to keep it up. For starters, we collectively saved a whopping $1500. We only spent $112 out of our allotted $124 on food. This was an eye opening experiment because we just didn’t realize how much we spent going out. Now that we know, we have decided to set our monthly total to $500. Once we reach that limit, we are going to stay in for the remainder of the month. This is obviously a work in progress and we are eager to make it work but we are going to take it a month at a time.<br />
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The time indoors resulted in Asghar and I spending a lot more time together and completing a lot of time consuming projects including our taxes. We were able to build a new raised bed, plant some new flowers and clear out some weeds. When I say we, I’ll be honest it was mostly him. My time was spent on cleaning the house, working on TEDxJacksonville, fighting with Comcast. The remaining time was spent reading books and the stack of magazines that used to pile up every month. </div>
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I would highly recommend this project to anyone wondering if they have the discipline to meet their long term goals. Financial goals both short term and long term are something we discuss and plan for all the time and this really helped us put it into perspective. I have been saying this forever but I really believe that goals are so much more accessible and realistic when you write them down and come up with a plan. You start to believe the rest is attainable because you have a plan. That alone gets you a third of the way there. </div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-53913590144638583112015-03-16T20:11:00.003-04:002015-08-02T16:40:58.282-04:00How We Are Surviving On Two Dollars A Day<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Asghar and I are now 16 days into our $2/day/person challenge and I am proud to say that we have not spent any money eating or socializing outside. I think for the first time, in a very long time, both of us even hung out at separate social events and only had water. </div>
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You may be wondering, "How do they do it?" Well it really isn't that hard. For starters, it is really important to plan ahead. Laziness is probably the only thing that prevented us from doing this before. Every Saturday, we sit and make a list of what we are going to eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day of the week. Doing this has really allowed us to shop for ingredients that we can keep using instead of doing what we usually do and buy one off items and then let them rot or sit there for weeks bef<span style="text-align: left;">ore we realizing we had them. For example, I bought carrots on Saturday so I could use them in my vegetable soup, shred them in my salad and roast them with my chicken. </span></div>
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We even planned ahead to have a double date. Last Thursday, we had a couple over for some spaghetti and meatballs. The meal was nothing fancy but it was still delicious and filling. And we got to enjoy a great evening with friends without spending $50-$100 on dinner which is what always happens when you go out for dinner. Some of our favorite dishes have been chicken stir fry, chicken tacos, potato cutlets, vegetable soup and of course a good old loaf of bread. Asghar has baked baguettes, sourdough loaves, and white loaves. I have attached pictures of each week's receipts and our meal plans for the week. </div>
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The thing that has touched me the most is being able to feel and understand what it is like for those that do not have the luxury to buy whatever they like. We might be doing this as a fun challenge but for many this is a reality. This really hit me on the morning of Friday, March 6th. It was warm most of the week and all of a sudden it got really cold on Friday. I had to be at the Mayor's education summit by 7:30 and of course left the house without checking the weather. When I got out to the car, I was freezing! But I had to deliver promotional material and could not be late. So I dealt with it and made my delivery downtown. I had a hour to kill before the program actually started so I quickly drove home and grabbed a coat. On the way home, I noticed a woman on Park St who was shivering and only wearing a t-shirt. She didn't have to ability to go home and grab a coat. That's when it hit me, I am so lucky to have everything I have and I felt ashamed because I could do nothing for her. </div>
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There is a reason food drives tell us to look into our pantries around Thanksgiving. We as a society tend buy more than we need. Why not buy less, save more and give more to the organizations we want to rather than feeling like we have to give around one holiday. It has been fun inspiring others to think about what they really need to live comfortably. Now that we know we can do this, I think we might make this an annual tradition. </div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-52088516398010796312015-03-03T22:59:00.002-05:002015-03-03T22:59:49.885-05:00Turning Thirty and Trying Something New<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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February was a decadent month. My parents visited and brought lots of home cooked meals. Asghar and I went to Hawaii for a week and had the
most amazing time, topped off by a lavish meal at Red Salt in Kauai.
Upon our return, we hosted a party to celebrate my 30<sup>th</sup> birthday with
our wonderful friends in Jacksonville. This was followed by a meal at Roy’s
with family and then a delicious dinner at Bistro Aix on my actual birthday.
Wow. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Needless to say, I felt spoiled, gluttonous and a little
guilty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My loved ones are wonderfully
caring and know how to make a girl feel special. But it also made me feel like
we have too much. It made me think back to my time in Cambodia trying to
stretch my $300/month allowance as far as I could. I realized that I just
don’t think about where our money goes as much as I believe I should. Yes, we save
and are conscious about not incurring debt, but generally we spend our income without a purpose. So I came up with an idea and proposed it to Asghar.<o:p></o:p></div>
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For the month of March, we have decided to only spend $2/day/person on food and
beverages, $28/week or $112/month. We both felt like it would be
fun to do this together and a great way to challenge ourselves. We have decided
everything in our pantry is fair game since we barely use those items. Purists would probably consider this cheating but we are taking baby
steps. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Discovering the items in our pantry has actually been a lot
of fun. We realized we have a lot of flour so we decided to bake our own bread.
In three days, we have baked two loaves and they were delicious.
One was lemon poppy and the other was a plain white loaf. We are working on our yeast starter for sourdough next.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Grocery shopping has also changed. Instead of just buying things on our list without looking at the cost, we found ourselves comparing weight and costs for most of our items. On March 1st, we went to get our goods for the week and only spent $23.50 and have $4.50 left over. Fresh field farms was
great for chicken and produce! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Shopping
was actually pretty easy once we decided what we were cooking for the week and
planned ahead. The planning has allowed us to prepare our breakfasts and
lunches for the next day in advance, which has reduced the temptation to spend
money outside. <o:p></o:p></div>
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We both do need our daily coffee intake. Luckily, if you
remember, we won free coffee for a year from Corner Bakery. This has helped me
significantly since I hate the coffee at work. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The biggest challenge has been declining social invitations.
We knew this would be the toughest part going in because this where most of our
cash goes. Some friends get what we are doing and some don’t. Some have been really receptive and have
been interested in doing potlucks and dessert evenings. But it is also really nice to have downtime at home because we can't go out. I am getting to do things I want like writing this post and working on my travel scrapbook. <o:p></o:p></div>
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It may seem like a random thing to do but I am really excited about seeing how far Asghar and I can take this and what we will learn from it. I know we will be ready to go Orsay as soon as this is over but we may also only bake our own bread from now on, or learn to be a little more conscious of how much we spend. I hope in the long term we will become a bit healthier and a bit more aware of how little we need to be comfortable.</div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-6239101636759619742014-12-31T09:45:00.001-05:002015-06-24T19:38:35.613-04:00Happy 2015!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Many of you have asked for photos from my time abroad and I have been extremely slow with them. Vermont provided a perfect sanctuary for me to review them all photos at my own pace and I am happy to share them with you.</div>
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The week before thanksgiving last year, I decided to drop what I was doing and complete life goal of living in Southeast Asia. I quit my job and moved to Phnom Penh, Cambodia to volunteer with a Swiss non-profit. It was a life changing experience and one that I will never forget. The two important things that I did learn were that you are powerful and strong as you allow yourself to be, and that the most difficult part of any endeavor is taking the first step, making the first decision. The what ifs can be consuming but once you are doing it, they slowly start to fade away. In different places, survival requires different things, based on the environment. Capacity for survival is the ability to allow yourself to be changed by environment. I learned to live on $300/month and write down every single expense. I learned to survive without an air conditioner in continuous heat waves. </div>
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For me, it was important to leave everything and the comfort of it all in order to learn more about myself and change for the better. As Robin Davidson's friend said in Tracks, "Getting off your butt and actually doing something for yourself is important for all of us. It's important that we leave each other..so that we can come back and swap information about what we've learnt even if what we do changes us and we risk not recognizing each other when we return." </div>
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Cambodia-</div>
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<span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><u><a href="https://picasaweb.google.com/104888402480919195945/Cambodia?authuser=0&authkey=Gv1sRgCNei893ysoGyYw&feat=directlink">https://picasaweb.google.com/104888402480919195945/Cambodia?authuser=0&authkey=Gv1sRgCNei893ysoGyYw&feat=directlink</a></u></span></span></div>
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Singapore-</div>
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<span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><u><a href="https://picasaweb.google.com/104888402480919195945/Singapore?authuser=0&authkey=Gv1sRgCInQsrOJvPSRiQE&feat=directlink">https://picasaweb.google.com/104888402480919195945/Singapore?authuser=0&authkey=Gv1sRgCInQsrOJvPSRiQE&feat=directlink</a></u></span></span></div>
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Myanmar-</div>
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<span style="color: blue;"><a href="https://picasaweb.google.com/104888402480919195945/Myanmar?authuser=0&authkey=Gv1sRgCOzI25LCypraUA&feat=directlink">https://picasaweb.google.com/<wbr></wbr>104888402480919195945/Myanmar?<wbr></wbr>authuser=0&authkey=<wbr></wbr>Gv1sRgCOzI25LCypraUA&feat=<wbr></wbr>directlink</a></span></div>
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Laos-</div>
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<span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><u><a href="https://picasaweb.google.com/104888402480919195945/Laos?authuser=0&authkey=Gv1sRgCL3wkKuvztnN5AE&feat=directlink">https://picasaweb.google.com/104888402480919195945/Laos?authuser=0&authkey=Gv1sRgCL3wkKuvztnN5AE&feat=directlink</a></u></span></span></div>
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Vietnam-</div>
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<span style="font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">Remember courage is grace under pressure. I wish you a wonderful 2015, one where you have the opportunity to realize your dreams, rediscover your strengths, muster your willpower and rejoice in the simple pleasures that life brings your way.</span></div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3563396343794692566.post-52729640416549145372014-11-23T18:57:00.001-05:002015-06-24T19:38:03.134-04:00What TEDxJacksonville means to me<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">Many of you have heard me talk about my work with TEDxJacksonville but I don't think everyone understands the role it plays in my life. I was first introduced to TEDxJacksonville in the summer 2012 when a dear friend decided to move to Colorado. Jessica was my saving grace in Jacksonville. I had been a resident for a little over six months and was very unsure if I could call this city my home. I met her before I moved and our friendship made me believe I could make the city mine. She knew that TEDx could serve to be my portal to other likeminded people and help me keep my sanity.</span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">She was right. I joined the organization in its first year, when it was known as TEDxRiversideAvondale. I thought I would get to meet some interesting people and help as needed but I ended up getting immersed as soon as Asghar and I got back from our honeymoon. I met so many dedicated change agents, many who I proudly call friends now. They helped me see the city’s potential. They made me realize that I could get involved and actually be the change I wished to see.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">Moving to the bible belt was my choice but I assumed certain things would be a given in a moderately large city </span></span>like Jacksonville<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">. I thought there would be tolerance and diversity. I thought the city would be open to new ideas and innovations. The reality was different. The city faced many challenges: no human rights ordinance, racism towards a respectable member of the human rights commission, lack of accessible public transportation and a lack of a vibrant downtown, amongst many other things. In many ways it felt like I had gone back in time and the city’s citizens were choosing to live in a bubble and ignore the progress being made in other cities </span></span>across<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"> the country</span></span><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">. </span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">But it wasn't just about the city. It was also about me. I didn’t realize what being a change agent really meant. Growing up in New York, I took the city’s policies and amenities for granted. As a teenager, I volunteered at the library and in soup kitchens and assumed that was all that was needed from me. I didn't think about the big picture. I was comfortable with the little I was doing and spending my remaining time with friends and family exploring the city. I wasn’t challenged.</span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">TEDxJacksonville made me realize that leaving my comfort zone was the best thing I could ever do. When there was nobody around for me to spend time with, I actually spent my time figuring out where I could be most useful. I finally got plugged in. I learned about the city and its resources and treasures, its pitfalls and challenges. But teaching myself wasn’t enough. What was I going to do with the information?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">I realized that sharing my views and newfound inspiration with other was the best thing I </span></span>could<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"> do. Providing this information in simple and entertaining TEDx events allowed other citizens of Jacksonville to get plugged in and decide where they wanted to help or at the very at least enabled them to learn more on topics of interest and allowed them to make decisions for themselves. It completely </span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;">takes over my life between the months of August and October and I wouldn’t have it any other way. It allows me to help brilliant people with powerful ideas have a platform to share them with others. The best part is seeing all 350 audience member leave the live conference feeling hopeful, encouraged and believing they can lead or at least support the change they want to see. </span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">I have seen myself and my city transform over my three years as Jacksonville's resident. I have witnessed everyday people influence the culture and help challenge the norms. I have seen myself transform into someone who sees the power of ideas and the potential all around me. It is so easy to be a naysayer and assume things will always be difficult to change. But change starts with small shifts and its ripple effects have the power to go beyond what we ever imagined. </span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">To everyone who sees all the wrong around them, I challenge you to actually do something about it instead of running away from of it or assuming that it isn’t your problem. I promise the feeling of accomplishment afterwards will be unlike anything you have ever experienced. </span></div>
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Sabeenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11432525906254388531noreply@blogger.com1